After many months of consideration and internal debate, I have deleted most of my personal social media accounts. There are several reasons for this, the primary of which is that I find that they are not conducive to my overall spiritual and mental health.
The narcissist cares only for one thing: themself. To the narcissist, it's all about how they can gain from us whatever it is that they've determined that we can provide while investing as little as possible in return. We're not coequal persons cooperating with them in building a friendship based on mutual trust and respect; rather, a narcissist sees us only as objects to be used in achieving their goals, filling whatever needs—emotional, material or otherwise—they may want from us based on the roles in which they have cast us.
As Rosh Hashanah, a great time for introspection and self-examination, comes to a close, I'm reminded of an oft told story regarding gossip and slander that has been adapted in various folk tales and by several communities of faith. Rather than retell one of the many variants here, I offer you links to several versions that which taken as a whole, paint the picture that I wish to share.
I'm a cat guy. I've always been a cat guy. I've cared for dogs, turtles and fish, and I enjoyed loving all of them, but my heart is squarely inclined to the feline for my primary living companions. Unfortunately, my mother is allergic to all four-legged pets, and with my past jobs, I had to move fairly often. Landing back with family between most assignments has made keeping pets difficult at best, so most of "my" cats have been strays.
I believe in Jesus. I'm not ashamed of the Gospel. I also believe in freedom of choice and agency. I make it a point never to force my beliefs on anyone. I hate "in your face" proselytization. This being said, I love sharing my faith and discussing the views of others with them. I know what I believe and why I believe it but I'm always searching, learning and growing, and these are the type of people that I want for my close friends.
My heart is breaking. It has been brought to my attention that I have been being slandered by former friends and friendly acquaintances, one of whom publicly accosted and berated me in front of several mutual friends in one of her places of employment. Continue reading Truth and Boundaries